"But ah'm not afraid of dyin'. Cause I know that when I get to heaven there are gonna be these wonderful trees, and ah'm gonna climb them. But you know what? Instead of leaves and flowers, those trees are gonna have fried eggs, and delicious Virginia ham, and big heaping bowls of biscuits and sausage gravy. And one day, Sammy, you're gonna meet me there, and we're gonna climb those breakfast trees together, and it's gonna be delicious and we're gonna be happy until the end of time."



Originally uploaded by glasshole.

Ship's Log--
Day one of our journey. For those of you just joining us, we're on vacation, just us girls.
The Crew:
-My mother, the ordained minister
-My step-sister, the future ordained minister who, no kidding, snorts when she laughs
-My sister, the thirteen year-old evangelist who is beginning to show the most fledgling inklings of rebellion in her political views
-My Self, I'm (the) black (sheep) and I'm proud

Since a large portion of my vocabulary is based upon the words "Fuck" and "Damn", the remainder composed mainly of creative ways of taking the lord's name in vain, you can imagine how I struggled in the face of a 9-hour car trip, but so far so good.
My guess is they'll allow me a few days of fun before they lock me in the room to begin the intervention/exorcism.
I know I'm harping on the subject, but generally when I associate with my family, my heathen bretheren are along to make me feel a little less, I don't know, evil?
Puts me in a bit of a mood.
On the upside, the hotel isn't a complete rat-hole. The name has the word "resort" in the title, which is a bit of an overstatement if you ask me, but then I've only been here a few hours.
I have but two goals for the next few days:
1. Get my mother to drink a margarita.
2. Get my step-sister to drink four and hit the dance club with me, where I will proceed to introduce her to Mr. Tequila shot. She's 29, it's time.

Watching: The Daily Show! On Cable! This vacation thing ain't so bad after all!